“I live this way a lot, squinting around the bend, anticipating what I’m about to get. Don’t we keep expecting to get something? In particular, to get it? To figure it out? To reach a culminating resolution, reward, complete understanding, wisdom, clarity, closure, the right answer, the holy grail? That very expectation fills us up … Continue reading I Celebrate Myself

Faith is a funny thing. We bought Lars his own deodorant since he is always playing with Michael’s. I guess he is fascinated with it because it represents something real in the adult world - we slather our bodies with stuff like deodorant, make up, lotions; we talk about how people disappear to a place called … Continue reading I Have A Little Faith In Me

One of the biggest adjustments I had to learn after becoming a mother was this: Washing the dishes no longer happens in one standing.  Throughout the day those dirty dishes haunt me and I have to get over it.  That greasy window - you know that one where your toddler has smeared hot dog and … Continue reading A Mother’s Agenda – Embrace the Spiral

Today, like most days, you were in and out of closets, drawers, and toy baskets, but mostly you were in and out of my memory. You pulled out gloves, hats, toys, books, and on my heart strings. I sit back dazed, thinking how will I ever clean this up and also how will I make … Continue reading For Larsen on Your Second Birthday

When I was a child, a preacher used a metaphor about a cake pan to describe human beings. Adam was the original cake pan. After the "great fall," the cake pan was dented. So as decedents of Adam, we are all now non-perfect cakes. We are somehow hollow, reduced. But I simply don't believe it. … Continue reading In the Image of God

I hate doing something when someone expects me to do it. That's why I have so many issues arising where my feminism and my personal choices collide.   If I learned something is expected from a woman with regards to how she operates in her marriage, or when someone dies, or when its assumed she is something … Continue reading Authentic Choices

When I see people liking images like these on Facebook, I have mixed feelings.  At first, these signs tie in to a common fear about the world. Sure, we need more parents to be parents and take care of their child so there will be less chaos.  But another side of me cringes. Spanking our children … Continue reading Developing Emotional Literacy

Some days Slayer (my dog) refuses to walk with us. If Mike is home, Slayer won't choose to leave him. But if I force him to come he seems mad. He sits his butt down, trying to persuade me not to take him. If I pull and pull, eventually he gets in line with the … Continue reading The Beauty of Chaos

Today I can't get rid of this feeling of being muted while screaming my views in my head. My pediatrician is a believer in Ferberizing. I simply am not. I feel babies cry to communicate, cry to let us know something isn't right. Yet, with the Ferber method, a parent "eases" them into self-soothing at bedtime. … Continue reading Giving Away Our Authority

I have been on the lookout even before Larsen was born for books and toys that feature mom and dad. I am overjoyed to find children's books that mention fathers as sweet, loving, and involved caretakers as much as mothers and a few toys that have an image of fathers on the packaging. As much as … Continue reading Fatherhood in Children’s Books