I have taught my son a new lesson. It was perfect - it only took me three years. I’ve taught him to undermine his own feelings and seek perfection. I've taught him to miss the good and go straight to evaluation mode. One day I asked him if he would like to explain what happened … Continue reading Praising Lars
The doctor was a short, round Asian man, who never spoke directly to me, only to my mother. He would incessantly clear his throat. His eyes looked everywhere but my face. He began with taking my temperature, then asking me to breathe in and out while he listened to my heart. I was ten. My … Continue reading The Parent of Two
Source: "Are You Okay?" Vs "You're Okay!"
But in asking him what his body is feeling, the emphasis is on assessing and responding appropriately to his own feelings instead of being informed of his feelings or looking to me and my reaction to figure out if he should be hurt.
As we wrestle Lars to get in bed, just to lie still as we read books - something startles me. My mother's voice jolts into my head: "When you become a mother, you will never know a love like the one you have for your children. But you will also have a fear like you … Continue reading The Lions at Night
Maybe it is also my approach. I can either be fearful - adding to the allure and power of guns - or I can understand the respect lesson - I can address their dangerousness, how guns in real life and guns in play are different, and offer these things in developmentally appropriate pieces to my son.
This just goes to show we can never be prepared for the challenges that babysitting - or parenting - throws at us, so just take them as they come and do your best.
Too many toys clutter rooms just like too many sensory triggers from toys cause clutter in the brain.
While some people have their hierarchies, we have our venn diagrams. While some people climb ladders, we're riding that carousel. I'm grateful for you not expecting me to choose between motherhood and marriage, but instead, you continually seek right next to me the ways parenthood encourages us to find the overlaps and build our love from there.
I say it repeatedly: Lars is my guru. He’s showing me how to enjoy my walk. Yet still I fight it. It still tries my patience when he inhibits my mission. When will I learn? When will I understand how to deal with those times I can't handle it when things don't go my way? How many more months will it take me to learn how to walk?